Letting go

Today, I did something that I would never do, something that has one of the hardest things to do in my adult life.................

I ACTIVATED MY SON'S CELL PHONE!!!! UGH

First let me say that I didn't buy the phone myself, nor did anyone else purchase the phone for him. I made it very clear to everyone that suggested the idea that I thought he was not ready for the phone. He got the phone because he earned it on his own.

During his summer program, he had to earn points by doing WORK! Something that is somewhat lost with this generation. The top prize was the Go phone and he had to do a lot to get that phone. So when he called me to tell me that he earned the phone I had two very different reactions.

One part of me was excited because he set a goal and he accomplished it. He worked very hard and this has not been his character in recent situations. I thought he was somewhat maturing. The other part of me went into fear. Is he old enough for a phone? Will he be responsible? Who does he need to call? I'm the only woman (besides my mother) in his life!

All these thoughts started rushing into my mind. I started to realize that in 8 years my son will be going to college and it will just be me again. Eight years go by fast. Shoot, he'll be 10 next month!

I realized that I have to let go just a little to allow him to grow. Its even harder when he doesn't have a man in his life. I guess that's why I have been so protective. I don't want him to get hurt. But I had to listen to a good friend that told me that sometimes he will have to go through things that I can't protect him from. I need to let go a little. So I have. Just a little. As time goes on he will have to step up and I think he can handle it.

He's not mowing the lawn yet, but I love and trust him to make the right decisions. We shall see!!!